Do you think librarians fuck?
That is the aggressive, on-the-nose question posed on the back cover of VCA‘s Midnight Librarians. Such a rhetorical query does not honestly need an answer, but in case there was any doubt, you need not look any further than any of the librarian-themed adult flicks we sell at AE. It is National Library Week – and today is specifically National Library Workers Day – so we thought we would take a look at the five all-time bestselling hot librarian movies in the Adult Empire archives. It is a wonder they have time to collect any overdue fees or reshelve any books. Here, the Dewey Decimal System starts and ends with 69.XXX.
Prolific director Jim Holliday helms this noir-ish detective mystery that does not seem to fully justify the title Midnight Librarians, since its connection to that theme is tangential at best. Holly Hollywood plays an L.A. private investigator tasked with finding a wayward librarian. Plenty of rimming, toe sucking, and lesbian action ensues! Numerous detours take us away from the main plot, but it does return to a library-themed adult gallery in the movies second half. Evan Stone is masturbating on a library couch and is interrupted by Kristina Black, who decides helping the hunk out is a better option than scolding him. Though probably a little too plot-heavy for modern adult audiences, it is a fun throwback for fans of vintage VCA features.
In Cover to Cover, Jenna Jameson plays a shy, withdrawn librarian, but do not let that make you think the girl dresses the part! As Adult Empire’s in-house reviewer Special K noted at the time, her hot attire is not an outfit I have ever seen on a librarian, but who would be stupid enough to cover up Jenna Jameson for even a second in frumpy gear? This is a adult for goodness sake! Well said! Jameson’s character lives out her dreams through books, which permits varied sex scenes such as a Civil War-era hookup, a 1950s hot car sex adventure, and more. This is presumably the only adult video where a copy of James M. McPherson’s Pulitzer Prize-winning Civil War book Battle Cry of Freedom plays a significant role. If Ken Burns had mentioned that in the guys famous Civil War documentary, we might have paid more attention in class.
Sexy specs and fun British accents? Be still my beating heart! Fuck The Librarians sets up sex scenes in exactly the entertainingly corny manner you would expect from a video with a library theme. The opener finds Demetri XXX returning a book that is a whopping six years overdue. Paige Ashley informs the hunk that the library has scuttled fines in favor of simply paddling people who bring back overdue books. The guy takes the spanking just like a champ, but once the guys pants are off, things move in a predictably hot direction. Other scenes find yet another illicit library masturbater getting busted plus all sorts of hardcore banging in among the stacks.
According to data from the U.S. Census, a full 83% of librarians are female. We are not sure whether that breakdown leads to an increased interest in lesbian experimentation, but that is absolutely where Lesbian Librarians puts its focus. Val Dodds is leafing through a copy of The Book of Mormon in the opening scene, but that soon gets tossed aside when Kimberly Kane sits down beside her. The highlight is absolutely the closing scene, starring Cherie DeVille and Dillion Harper. Cherie’s lascivious gaze, combined with the longing way the girl chews on the end of her pen, creates an atmosphere of lustful anticipation as prepares to pounce on adorable – but not so sweet – coed Dillion. DeVille’s oral sex game is absolutely on point here, but we are not so sure the girl would last very long as a librarian, given how prone the girl is to seducing nubile patrons!
It is another round of book-oriented lesbian fun, but this time with a kinkier twist! The term bibliophile is taken to its literal outrageous here. The introductory adult gallery finds Elizabeth Thorn and Missy Minks roaming the Sexuality section of the stacks, thumbing through numerous volumes and finding carnal satisfaction in their smell and touch. Later, they unleash all their Sapphic desires in a bed drenched in books – as bemoaning the fact that they could not get busy in the bookstore itself. Books remain close by all the remaining scenes, which include action as varied as light BDSM, sex toy play, and more. For the true bibliophiles of the world, this is a must-watch!